At a critical point searching and hoping to heal my self. I rely on the Internet to connect me to the outside world. One of my favorite windows to peer out of was YouTube. A day the spring of 2015 I came across videos awakening something within me. Women taking life to the edge, living to their full potential.
Videos with titles like, “Women are awesome”, others with Women skateboarding. Ideas for realizing the hope to get better that I clung to, sparked within me. “Skateboarding”, that actually might get me outside“. You see, I had been dealing with anxiety, depression, and p.t.s.d for years. Something had to happen my health was suffering, getting worse, my grip on life loosening.
So I decided to order a long board off of eBay and see what happened next. The first video posted to, Skate Girl, my YouTube channel was me unboxing it. I wanted to document this new beginning. Riding skateboards a little during my childhood was some exposure, but this was my real introduction to a life rolling on maple and urethane.
Wasting no time getting started, the flame of renewal and healing was lit. My Mom helped get the things needed while I waited for the skateboard to arrive. Watching more YouTube videos giving me tips, how to ride and bomb hills, with my helmet, pads and new Airwalk skate shoes I was ready to roll
First Times Out
I hit the hills near my apartment, nothing too extreme of course, but it certainly felt extreme. I also made YouTube videos of these first outings, the platform would become a place for me to save my journey into skateboarding.
With visions of carving my longboard around banks. As my confidence grew, I wanted to ride a skate park for the first time. To do it all, but still didn’t realize and know how I’d get there. Or much about the different ways of skateboarding. I just wanted to skate, experience as much of it as I Could
The Skate Park
Remembering my first day rolling up to the skate park that would become my home park. There were a lot of skaters there, They were working together repairing and painting the park. I was nervous and questioning if I should even be here.
With all the activity going down. One of the OG’s encouraged me to skate saying, ”go ahead skate through these guys won’t bother you“. I rolled over some mellow transition avoiding the areas they were working.
My first day at a skate park was the day when skaters came together for mural and repair day to take care of their park. I experienced encouragement to keep skating, I don’t think I would have otherwise. So I spent hours there that day rolling about and trying to emulate some of the tricks on my longboard that the skaters were doing.
Old School
Then a skater who I’d come to know as Old School rolled up to me, popped his skateboard into his hand and said. ”You need to get a skateboard like this, it had an old school shape with a concave, kick tail and white rails. He continued to say, “especially if you want to do tricks”.
He's a kind and encouraging skater, but I was still very anxious around people so I don’t think I took it all in and connected. But It had begun, my journey into skateboarding and getting outside into the warm summer air after living a life indoors.
Skateboarding took hold of me real quick and I ordered a couple more decks online, one similar to Old School’s. I just wanted to skate not limited to what I could learn to do.
The only difference with this skateboard is that it had a kick on the nose, kind of a hybrid. Next time I showed up to the park with a board that was more like his. My anxiety and depression didn’t just go away though. It is never that easy. I still battle it to this day, skateboarding has given me a direct, active way to fight back.
My YouTube Channel where I share my skate life.
https://goo.gl/DQ7nYv